Deception and Desire

“Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers. Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” – James 1:16-17

For the first time, I noticed this short sentence that could be applied to either of the two well-known verses which sandwich it: do not be deceived, beloved. Don’t think that you can nurture some hidden sinful thought without it getting the better of you eventually. There is an element of deception at work here: by definition you will think you can manage it, you will think it harmless, when all the time it is leading you on a path straight to death. And we know how this works, right? Roots of bitterness that lead to hatred, annoyances that lead to anger or contempt, sexual fantasies which lead to infidelity. Sin is never static. It gestates.

But the deception applies to the following verse as well: the root of the problem is not really believing that we have a Father who gives us every good and perfect gift. There is a tendency for us to feel that God is holding out on us, that he is in some way parsimonious or fickle, but that is a lie. God is completely unchanging in his intent for our good. Rather than allowing our desires to lure us to sin, it is possible to let them lead us to a deeper experience of God. 

How does this happen? Sometimes living with the pain of a desire deferred allows us to more sharply or deeply express and live into faith in God. Sometimes the desire itself is a testimony to a longing which only God can meet, if only we learn how to receive it. We read earlier in Psalm 107, “For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things.” Do you believe this? Have you experienced it? C.S. Lewis writes, “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

Infinite joy is offered us, and it is found, not in an event or circumstance or possession or other person, but in God. Our desires ultimately all point to this, as long as we don’t become deceived otherwise.